Monster Coughs, Sputters, and Dies

Mark warned me.  He said that Monster had battery issues, or something, and I might have to jump it to get it started today.  We have a JUMPSTART thingy from Wal-Mart that we hook up to dead cars to bring them back to life, but it didn’t do much for Monster.  No problem.  We’ll eat SpaghettiOs and Meatballs (gag) rather than free meals at Zaxby’s, and we’ll get to Ben’s audition somehow.  Thanks to my dad and Uncle Al, we did get a proper jump and drove Gerbils (the name for my mother’s 4Runner) to the audition. 

Monster started fine at my parents’ house, and all was well, so it seemed, until we were creeping along in construction traffic and the lights began flickering.  Right in the middle of our quoting Psalm 23, it died.  In the middle lane of the Interstate.  9PM.  7 kids.  And my father thought Mark was kidding when he called to tell him of our plight.  Once he convinced my father that he was serious, all we needed to do was get 7 kids and one mom across three lanes of Interstate to wait for Grandpa and Uncle Al to take them home. 

Traffic going north was pretty slow, but there was one Mental Giant who kept yelling “Are you stalled” from behind us.  Um, well, figure it out.  Good grief. I’m not sure he ever did figure it out, but he seemed pretty upset with us as he sped his red convertible around us in order to go 50 yards up the road.

Then there was the Nice Southern Guy who actually helped Mark get Monster out of the middle lane.  Thank you, Nice Southern Guy in a Big Truck.  God Bless You.  By that time I had effected the Traipsing With Two Toddlers, One Baby, and Four Children Across Somewhat Busy Highway In The Dark.  We then proceeded down the road until we were all standing behind a guard rail.  One son (any guesses which) decided that it would be more memorable if he got to wet the roadside grass, so he turned and did his business.  They were all troopers, though, and the boys were indispensably helpful with the girls, especially getting them across the two south-bound lanes of highway, where running was necessary. 

But in the End, we were rescued by Grandpa and Uncle Al, and Mark and Monster were towed in a timely manner to the auto mechanic, where his good friend Courtney will pick him up and bring him home.   Thank God for family, friends, and blessings untold.