Lessons Are Learned

Having twins is a great blessing. All mothers of twins must believe this, have faith that it will one day be so, because the beginning isn't full of sentimental happiness and endless bliss. It's hard work, much harder than having one baby.

To prepare myself for having twins, I should have played Twister more as a child. What you must go through to get your right hand on yellow and your left foot on red along with four other people is very like the contortions needed to hold, feed, burp, and/or comfort two babies at a time with the help of a toddler. Mind you, I don't try to deal with both babies at a time unless every other adult is busy with something else, but when someone becomes available, the sight of me setting up two bouncy seats one-handed or holding both babies in one arm and their bottles to their mouths with the other hand, or sitting between two babies with Grace on my lap helping me feed them is so comical they either laugh and run for the camera or tell me I've got it under control.

And I do have it under control--somewhat, and only every once in awhile. In the back of my mind, I'm thinking "I'll eventually be left alone with 6 kids" and it is a scary thought. My last in-house help leaves October 16, which makes October 17 D-Day for me. Or FS-Day (flying solo). On October 17, we will hear more crying (not me!, the babies) because I won't always be able to hold them both. My house will begin to deteriorate in cleanliness, because I simply can't do it all. Meals may become a haphazard thing, especially breakfast. Pop-tarts have 7 essential vitamins and minerals, afterall.

Back to my blog title. Things I've learned about babies:
1. To awaken a baby, you simply put her in her cradle.
2. To get a baby to go to sleep, you get her bottle ready.
3. When you really, really need sleep is the night she will be at her (their) worst.

and about twins specifically:
4. People who tell you to get them on the same schedule are insane. When they are on the same schedule, they need to be fed and held and burped at the same time, which is very difficult unless you have lots of extra help.
5. People who tell you to stagger the babies' schedules are insane. When you stagger the schedule, you are always doing something with a baby, which translates into no time for anything else (showering, toileting, cleaning, making food, sleeping)
6. People who tell you to nurse them both at the same time are insane. Tandem nursing means stripping to your waist and not being able to scratch your nose.
7. People who tell you to supplement with a bottle are insane. If tandem nursing is hard, then tandem bottle feeding is even harder (unless you are an octopus).
8. Having twins is insane.